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very shocked at this story

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Jenn
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very shocked at this story

#1 Unread post by Jenn » Thu Apr 14, 2011 2:46 pm

A couple have been forced to shell out child maintenance for a baby they will never meet, after their surrogate mum changed her mind during pregnancy. The couple, referred to as Mr and Mrs W, were shattered when a judge awarded their surrogate custody of the child, only to be told by the Child Support Agency (CSA) that they were also legally required to pay child maintenance.

The couple originally agreed to pay £10,000 to a surrogate kown as Miss N, who they found on a surrogacy website. But Mr and Mrs W were devastated when Miss N had a change of heart halfway through the pregnancy and decided to keep their baby.

Miss N was granted custody of the baby girl, who is the biological daughter of Miss N and Mr W, by a judge. She was also allowed to keep the £4,500 already paid to her by the couple, and Mr W was ordered to pay £568 each month in child support.

The couple also gave up contact rights to the baby, as they say it would have been too emotional and unfair on her.

“She has taken away our baby and now she is taking our money," Mr W told the Daily Mail. "To me, that is completely wrong. The CSA has made the decision as if we were a couple who had broken up, but our situation is unique. We had agreed for her to carry a baby for my wife and myself. I have written to Downing Street and my MP to call for a change in the law,” he added.
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weezypops
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Re: very shocked at this story

#2 Unread post by weezypops » Thu Apr 14, 2011 2:49 pm

Hmm, I have to say I do question the truth of anything I read that is from the Daily Mail! You would think they'd have covered this sort of thing in some kind of contract when they first agreed to it all wouldn't you?
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Jenn
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Re: very shocked at this story

#3 Unread post by Jenn » Thu Apr 14, 2011 2:53 pm

oh? was it in the daily mail?

i agree surely youd have a contract!
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sheeina
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Re: very shocked at this story

#4 Unread post by sheeina » Thu Apr 14, 2011 8:44 pm

i would struggle to understand how anyone would be able to do that to someone.
the gift of a child is the most powerfull gift you could ever give to someone.

i do hope its not true!
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Millie_loves_Luca
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Re: very shocked at this story

#5 Unread post by Millie_loves_Luca » Thu Apr 14, 2011 9:06 pm

I dont think the contracts are legally binding, I looked into this a bit when I thought I couldnt conceive. But I never pursued it because I was terrified something like this would happen to me. xx
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BrandonsMum08
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Re: very shocked at this story

#6 Unread post by BrandonsMum08 » Thu Apr 14, 2011 10:14 pm

If im honest, it doesnt surprise me! The CSA are a bunch of twats. Im not saying that because my OH begrudges paying maintenance for his daughter, he was the one who actually went to csa because his ex was frauding the benefits system at the time by not claiming the money he was giving her as cash each month, and he didnt want to see his daughter homeless.
We do however, think it is unfair to have a blanket rule of percentage of whatever the fathers salary is. They have no right using the phrase (which they use ALOT) of "this is what we believe it costs to raise a child".... right, so the child of a man earning £12,000 a year costs less to raise than a child of a man who is on £30,000 a year? yeah right! What my OH has to pay in maintenance, his daughter no way costs! We dont even spend that amount on our 2 put together and they are both toddlers! And what makes me laugh even more, is when Ruby was born, they reduced payments by less than £5 a month haha what a joke! If anyone knows how to raise a newborn on £5 a month, please tell me how!! Instead we are funding her, her partner and her other child and new baby due any day with fake nails, hair extensions, hair dye, new clothes and apparently the new baby has enough new clothes to wear once and throw away whilst his daughter is put in crappy damaged and stained clothes from bootsales wearing school clothes that a 3 sizes too small for her!! (no im not exaggerating).

So yeah, after willing fathers being taken for everything they have, i can believe this story. Im all for the CSA catching up with unwilling fathers, but hate the way they sting the innocent and have the cheek to be calling them the day a payment is late due to a poxy bank holiday. It should all be scrapped and started again with a flat rate of HALF of what is deemed a reasonable cost of raising a child, after all, a child has 2 parents, not just a father. No matter what a fathers earnings are.
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Re: very shocked at this story

#7 Unread post by BrandonsMum08 » Thu Apr 14, 2011 10:14 pm

sorry for the rant lol
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Sasha990
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Re: very shocked at this story

#8 Unread post by Sasha990 » Sat Feb 17, 2018 8:26 am

Tired of all the complications i had gone through during pregnancy i gave up upon the hope of having a baby.
Now i am married again and me and my husband are thinking of having of having a baby.
I know that at this age and keeping in mind all the aspects regarding mt previous pregnancy complications getting pregnant again will be not a good idea.
So i have convinced my husband for having a baby via surrogacy.
For that purpose we have consulted a number of clinics and have positive reviews about surrogacy.
Now as i and my husband are ready for surrogacy option,
We are looking for a good clinic to support us and guide us through the whole process.
I'm looking for a good woman who can carry our child in her womb for 9 months with care.
I met many women who are offering their services to many clinics regarding surrogacy.
But still i am looking for a perfect lady who can help us.
I guess keeping in aspects like me a woman should probably go for surrogacy method to have a baby.
Please share your experience if you have any regarding surrogacy.
Thanks in advance.

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Re: very shocked at this story

#9 Unread post by KatherineGrant » Sat Feb 17, 2018 11:05 am

I find this to be absolutely horrifying. It is because of women like this that surrogacy gets a bad name. These women make other women think surrogacy is not good. so they remain childless throughout. They disgust me. Thankfully my surrogate wasn't like her. It is sad when even the law goes against you. This was their biological child she has no right to keep it. I do not have words for how appalled I am. It is seriously wrong for people to do this and yet they do. No reason can justify what she has done. I hope that the ruling is overturned in favor of the couple. My sympathies are with you.

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Re: very shocked at this story

#10 Unread post by lea-marie » Tue Apr 03, 2018 4:59 pm

Sasha990 wrote:
Sat Feb 17, 2018 8:26 am
Tired of all the complications i had gone through during pregnancy i gave up upon the hope of having a baby.
Now i am married again and me and my husband are thinking of having of having a baby.
I know that at this age and keeping in mind all the aspects regarding mt previous pregnancy complications getting pregnant again will be not a good idea.
So i have convinced my husband for having a baby via surrogacy.
For that purpose we have consulted a number of clinics and have positive reviews about surrogacy.
Now as i and my husband are ready for surrogacy option,
We are looking for a good clinic to support us and guide us through the whole process.
I'm looking for a good woman who can carry our child in her womb for 9 months with care.
I met many women who are offering their services to many clinics regarding surrogacy.
But still i am looking for a perfect lady who can help us.
I guess keeping in aspects like me a woman should probably go for surrogacy method to have a baby.
Please share your experience if you have any regarding surrogacy.
Thanks in advance.
Hi Sasha...

Big hugs to you for your experiences. There are some fantastic support groups on Facebook, including ones with prospective surrogates... are you a part of any of these?
Borderline hippie, intersectional feminista, SJKW and general grump!

Ewwas
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Re: very shocked at this story

#11 Unread post by Ewwas » Mon Oct 04, 2021 7:15 am

This is really a little weird ....


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