Going through a divorce is an all-encompassing, enveloping mist you have to somehow navigate your way through. For some people it is quick and peaceful, but for others it is drawn-out and dramatic, either way, the end result is the same.
If you are currently going through a divorce, or you are just about to enter the process, then here are six helpful ways to make the whole ordeal smoother for you and those around you:
- Do your Research
You can research the proceedings around divorce on your own or you can consult a specialist divorce solicitor. Either way, make sure you are clued up on what you are about to get in to. Don’t be scared to ask questions during this time, it will be more helpful for you to gain advice earlier rather than later.
- Be Civil
This tip is easier said than done, particularly if you are mid-way through difficult divorce proceedings. However, the more civility you can maintain, the smoother the negotiations will be. Civility is particularly important in cases of families and battles with custody, remember that when your partner is railing you up, do not take the bait.
- Be Aware of Costs
Solicitors or lawyers are a very helpful lifeline in divorce proceedings, but remember they are not there to be a shoulder to cry on. If you choose to use your solicitor’s office like a therapy session, just remember that they will be billing you for their, unqualified, therapeutic advice. Know your limits when it comes to costs, use friends and family for consolation and use a solicitor or a lawyer for consultation.
- Honesty is the Best Policy
There is no need to lie in any aspect of divorce. There is no need to lie to your partner as to why you want a divorce. There is no need to lie to your children or family as to why you are getting a divorce. There is also no need to lie to your solicitor about yourself or your partner.
Clear, honest, healthy conversations are the only way to deliver a divorce that is smooth and amicable on both sides.
The Netflix password is not a good enough reason to start a fight with your partner. Pick your battles carefully, there is going to be a lot of history brought up throughout any divorce proceedings and simple, and petty arguments can go off like landmines. Navigate your way through them carefully and make sure you know exactly what you want out of the divorce before you go in: it might be partial custody of your children, for example.
Either way, be sure to know what you are willing to give up to find a happy compromise.
- Don’t be afraid to get support
You may feel as though you are going through this alone, but remember that you are not. Seeking help and comfort from friends and family can provide wonderful support and if this is not possible, find help through self-help books and online articles which may contain comfort for you in your time of need.