Navigating the dating world has to be one of the top sources of anxiety for most people! It takes courage to put yourself out there for “strangers” to get to know you and possibly pass judgment on you. However, when you put things into perspective, you will realize that it doesn’t have to be this hard. In fact, something as simple as acknowledging that you’re in control of your dating life can neutralize any negative feelings you might have towards the idea of dating.
Whether you are a man or a woman, there are some tips and tricks that you can learn to prepare yourself for dates. Read on for some simple tips to ensure you enjoy dating.
Most people, both men, and women alike tend to conceal their true personalities when on dates as a way of self-preservation against being judged for who they really are. While it is only normal that you would want to present yourself as best as you can, you end up coming across as ingenuine or worse, fake.
Try to relax and let the other person see your true personality without giving away too much too soon. This will do you both good, as your date will feel more encouraged to act naturally when they see you at ease, which is the whole point. Otherwise, it is only a waste of time if both of you choose to put on a facade just because it seems safer. Once you get comfortable with the unsettling aspect of dates, you will be able to see them for what they really are, a great chance to potentially meet that special someone.
Dress the Part
Even if you are the last person to care about fashion or the way you look, when you are going on a date, you need to put some effort into your appearance. Not only will your date appreciate that you put in the effort for them, but it can also give you the confidence boost you need when you are meeting someone for the first time.
To build upon the previous point, you should pick an outfit that helps you be yourself. If you do not feel comfortable in high-heels, then simply don’t wear them on a date. Instead, go for a more elevated version of pieces that you normally wear. For men, Adam White, creator of Jasper Holland, says that a great first date outfit is a classic white T-shirt with a pair of tapered khakis This outfit is the perfect blend of effortless and chic; it reflects enough polishing in an easy and laid back manner. As for women, a silk blouse with a pair of well-fitted jeans and pointed flats can be an excellent choice to look elegant without compromising on comfort. Remember the key is to choose clothes that will make you look good and feel good at the same time.
Show Genuine Interest
When two people go out on a date, it is already established that there is a basic mutual interest. During the date, both men and women want to feel like their date is genuinely interested in getting to know them better. The easiest way you can show your date your interest is by asking questions about their job, hobbies, pets, etc. However, some people don’t like to get too personal, especially during the first couple of dates. So if you feel like your questions might sound intrusive, it is always nice to let your date know that they don’t have to answer if it’s making them uncomfortable.
In addition to asking questions, you should also listen. This assures your date that you are genuinely interested in them, not just trying to cross off one more item on your checklist.
Choose the Right Venue
Finding the right location can make a huge difference in the success or failure of any date. You want to find a place where both of you can feel comfortable enough to relax and have a good time. Loud bars are not usually a good idea for first dates as you will find yourselves struggling to have a decent conversation. Instead, choose a nice restaurant or a coffee place where you can chat and have a good time.
If you are the one making the reservations, ask your date beforehand about their preference of cuisine if you will be having dinner together. It is also better to choose a place that is relatively close to the both of you to remove the pressure of commuting and fretting to be on time.
Be Courteous No Matter How the Date Is Going
Unless there are some serious alarms for you to go running for the hills while on your date, you should always be courteous. Even if you do not believe that there is chemistry there, be a pleasant person until the last minute of the date as you part ways.
By now you probably understand that dates are nerve-wracking for both parties, so don’t be the person who makes their date feel worse by showing that you are not having a good time. If you make up your mind then and there that you will never be romantically involved with the person sitting in front of you, then maybe you can become friends. You can accidentally pass on the opportunity of getting to know some amazing people just because you met them in the wrong context. Don’t limit your dates to romantic relationships, even if it is the main purpose. Let this new relationship develop naturally into whatever it is meant to be.
Dating, first and foremost, should be fun. The above tips should hopefully make you see that. Getting to know people is an often-underestimated pleasure, especially for those who approach dating with the conviction of “finding the right one”. Unless you are among the lucky few, you will probably go on countless dates before you can actually find your significant other, so you might as well have some fun while you’re at it.